Since the week that passed was pretty miserable let's sum it up quickly:

 

Monday: 

cons:

Lost my wallet

Got rejected by last week's hookup

pros:

Got my wallet back from the police so the only loss was the SEK 400 I had to pay for a new bank card since I cancelled my old one.

 

Wednesday:

Cons: Got rejected by the jobs I interview for on the Tuesday

 

Friday: 

Pros: Got great grades in school this term 97%, 98 % 100 % respectively.

Cons: The only way to get this grades with extremely limited effort is if the school is designed for retards.

 

Saturday & Sunday Cons: Constant rain made my soccer games cancelled.

 

Other events this week:

• I worked at the Stadium chilling out and witnessing a parody of an AFL game due to the heavy rain.
• I went on a date.: The good thing about her was that she had good interests (sports and games) and she did not spend half the date talking about astrology or trying to figure out how much money I am making. The bad thing about her was her teeth that was horrible. In a sense that would make us a good match she:horrible teeth me:horrible income, so we'll see how that ends. I would definitely not mind getting to know her on a deeper personal level, which is kind of prerequisite. 
• I reached word 45,000 on my novel 35,000 to go.
• I watched World War Z. Nothing special but not bad either. Definitely not worth the money they spent making it. While on the World War Z topic: Brad Pitt should really get a new hair cut.The long hair made him look like a hunk when he was younger, now it makes him look like a homeless alcoholic. 

 

//  The Master

This week had a special theme when it came to dating. Both dates were doctors, not medical ones but PH.D . The outcome of these dates were quite different though.

 

The first one was quite ugly. Not wolf ugly, but still unattractive enough to trigger the emotion "no no no" when I first saw her. When the initial reaction is "no no no" one has two options:

• Try holding a conversation for a while anyway, in theory this can still be interesting but in reality it never will since the basis of a date is to find out whether there is room for sexual activities soon or in the future. This applies to 98 % of the population as even people who would never have a one night stand and are only looking for a long term relationship still plan to have sexual activities at some stage.
• Be upright and tell the date straight away: "Sorry but you are too ugly, so let's save ourself this awkward and pointless hour of torture."

The highlight of my day was that I reached 35000 words and my novel The Shadows of Death is at it's halfway point wordwise.  I had planned it to be like a hundred pages in total so following my initial plan I would be almost done since I am at page 82 now. But then I got informed that a novel should have at least 70000 words and preferably 80000 so there is no point in doing something if it's not done properly. It's a bummer but I have chosen to solve this problem by making the story less linear and chose to develop more characters than my initial plan. According to my mum who has read the first 75 pages the story is really good and she has a very difficult time figuring who the killer is and that is a good thing for a crime story.

 

When it comes to writing I just thought about the fact that I have not written any poetry for a very long time. Writing poetry is maybe not my specialty but it can still be an inspiring and semi complex pastime when one has someone special to write to. Since I don't but I still feel the need to show some of my readers who has never read my poems my abilities please see below the latest two poems I wrote approxiamately one and half years ago. Enjoy!

 

Melanie

The only girl there can be
the only girl that I can see
the awesome Magic Melanie.

 

I love the touch of your soft skin
which gives life to feelings deep within
a life full of joy and free of sin.

 

Your eyes shining in the morning light,
Is earth’s most beautiful sight
to see them again I’ll do all in my might.

 

Without you, it’s hard to sleep
Fear of losing you makes me weep
Alone the stairs seem so steep

 

My destiny was hanging in the balance,
All reduced to a game of chance
with all my strength I took a stance

 

Hopefully you’ll listen to your inner voice
and then make up your hearts choice
Unaffected by ambient noise

 

It might end up at a beach
standing together within arm’s reach
giving our lives speech.

 

Remembering You

Remembering when we kiss.

It’s a timeless moment filled with bliss

A sensation that I dearly miss.

 

When I am seeing you smile
I am motivated to go the extra mile
Standing up against anything that is wile

 

When I am holding your hand,
I am transported to a foreign land
Where nothing is dull and bland.

 

Remembering us having fun
And all I want to do is to run
To be with you yet again hun.

 

The soft touch of your lips,
And the movement of your hips
Girl what I’d love to take some sips.

 

Intelligence, humor and wits
A great body, A lovely smile and tits
Lucky is anyone, who next to you sits.

 

So baby cure my from my dark plight,
By handing me the rope of light,
Pulling me to a future so bright.

 

//The Master

Even though I have had a relatively good momentum all throughout the weekend I still woke up bitter this morning. I think this negative mind set was helped by the fact that my cell phone by mistake woke me up at 7 am which is okay when working but not very okay while not working.

 

It did not improve upon realisation that the teacher had appearently realised the obvious that the courses of the school are made so retards could pass them without any form of effort. But instead of making the course challenging i.e. one have to think and use actual brainpower they just made it drawn out as hell but still very simple. This of course resembles work a lot, but at work you get paid while at school you don't. So what was the task you ask? Well to put together a 35 day long day to day itinerary for a 12 stop round the world trip complete with flights, visa requirements and at least 3 attractions in every city with some kind of motivation.  The problem is that most cities have the same choice of top ten attractions: A few monuments, a few palaces, a few art museums and a few consert places. I.E. most cities are more or less identical. So basically one is copy pasting every city but changing the names of the attractions. How boring is that? 

 

Oh well after 15 dreadful pages and reaching halfways I postponed this dreadful work for something else to play my part as Doctor Lundqvist free of charge relationship expert/psychologist. A woman in Sweden that I occasionally whine about my life to whined about her life where the problem was that she had a very strong biological bond to a guy she met on a holiday (i.e. she wanted to fuck him) but she had not fucked him as her logical morals said he was a bad boy and that she should stay away from that category. 

 

Biologically every woman is attracted to the bad boy as this kind of character resembles and behaves like the chief tan of the tribe back when humans were primates. Problem is most women are smart enough to realize that a relationship with the bad boy while end up with physical and emotional abuse. But I mean if one is willing to trade an occasional black eye for good sex, sure let them but I can't stand the concept of women who try dating convicted violence criminals then whinging about getting a beating. That's pure bullshit and they get what they deserve.

 

Feeling lazy and realising that movie ticket are half price for students I went to cinema instead of the gym this evening. Watching The Great Gatsby which technically is a very good movie but it falls from the classic flaw of making a very simple issue very complex. Which makes the entire movie boring and dreadfully long. To summarise the plot Leo is in love with a woman for five years but she does not want him since he dirt poor. So  he goes away and starts a booze smuggling empire. 5 years later he is really rich and the woman of his dreams have married another rich guy who is a lot uglier than Leo and has also has the strange habbit of fucking other women that is uglier than his wife.  The easy thing for Leo would be: 

• Go to the woman and tell her that you are rich now and you want her. Since she married the other guy for the money only she would probably do the shift as her husband is constantly cheating anyway.

 

After a few bitter weeks a few good things have happened lately and I feel my momentum might be heading the right way again.

 

On the Friday I was working and it was really relaxed as the boss basically told us to take it really slow as there was not much to do but he still wanted us to stick around in case he wanted something done later. That's the spirit so  basically I was sitting in the warehouse of the furniture store chatting with my Scotish colleague.He had a horrible accent that was almost incomprehensible but as long as I get paid I don't mind chatting anyway. Then I can't get why some Scots and Irishmen can't speak proper English, after all it has been the mother language for more than 500 years, that's a lot of time for adaptation I reckon!

 

The Saturday shift was at the football stadium and that is the only hospitality job I have ever liked. I mean what in the concept of serving drinks to 20 people in a VIP lounge and watching a game of sport is there not to like. It's almost like watching a game with your friends except they are not your friends and you don't get to drink. On the other hand you would not get to see the game for free and get paid $26 an hour if you saw it with your friend so still a good payoff.

 

Today was an historic event by the way when my team actually managed to win a game. 2 minutes of brilliance was enough to outshine 88 minutes of mediocricity and we won 2 to 1. Good thing today was that no-one was really bad. No-one was really good either but obviously the guy who scored the goals, Tim, got my vote for the man of the match. 

 

As for myself I was alright. The ball was my enemy most of the game but I refer that to the absolutely woeful pitch. At two instances the ball was not my enemy and that was when I assisted the two goals. :)

 

// The Master

Today I met up with a woman whose number I received during my crazy boozing and hunting session last friday. I cannot say that I had the highest of expecations, but I was at the gym and she basically lived next to my gym so it was not all lot of hassle to check her out. 

 

Anywas we met up and she actually looked better than I thought she would. That was the positive part.

 

The negative part was the apparent lack of personal chemistry. The language barrier (she was Japanese) did not help but I am quite sure the lack of chemistry was on a more fundamental level. Oh anyway I was surprised after 45 minutes when it started raining and she asked if I was hungry or I wanted to come by her flat and watch a movie. I actually was hungry but choose the movie option anyway as the

 

"Do you wanna come by my flat and watch a movie" should be a recognized code word for having sex. Apparently it was not in this case and instead I sat hungry for two hours on an incomfortable kitchen chair, watching a movie on a 7 inch screen. Still it could have been a lot worse. I spent no money and I had no expectations so I felt no disappointment. 

 

Better luck next time I guess.

 

//The Master

For some bizarre reason todays game started at 9am. From what I saw today this seem to have motivated several player to go to the game straight from the pub. This was by far the worst game I have played in my entire life. sure I have lost games large before so it's not the biggest loss even though 0-8 is humiliating and embarassing. But the way we lost!

 

First of all let's state straight that our opponents was not good. But our players and especially our wing backs were the worst ever. Let's illustrate. If you don't know what to do with the ball what do you do?

• Hit it long and high towards the corner flag and let the wingers run on it?
• Hit a weak pass into the field without even looking giving the ball away in a dangerous position?

Between my last blog entry and Friday night life was pretty dull and bland. It was not made better by the fact that I started a new course in school led by no-one less than Queen Elizabeth. Obviously not the real Queen but similar accent and annoyance factor. Another annoying fact was that I was called to a model casting but did not get the job.  

 

 

This was by no means a disaster as I know I am looking good but not THAT good. It is still a shame though as most people are status whores and a lot of people would prefer the prospect of dating a Swedish model, than a Swedish waiter. 

 

 

Oh well let's fast forward to the crazy night out. Danni the Dane was leaving Sydney for Cairns with the morning flight and considered it to be a good idea to booze the night away so after finishing a waiter shift at a place that does not expect staff to fake smile but simply to carry plates or perform whatever tasks there is at hand. (Which is great by the way, who in their right mind would actually be happy working as a waiter? Boring and close to minimum wage not exactly inspiring. Luckily the minimum wage in Australia is $19 an hour and waiting position pays $21, so life could still be a lot worse i.e. working in a Bangladesh Sweatshop) 

 

 

Anyway we met up at Hyde Park where Danni and his friends where performing the masochistic procedure of drinking the content of a box of wine. Following the wise words of a former university mate "To be at a pub sober is as inappropriate as it is being at work drunk" I joined in on this exercise, which as it turned out was not the only exercise i joined in on last night. After the tastebud punishing assignment of finishing the box, Danni’s French friend convinced us of how great a certain place in King's Cross was. What he failed to mention was that they were charging a staggering $25 entry fee and that the place was actually fucking lame!

 

 

After a short while at the expensive and lame place also known as Trademark Hotel; fate made us leave. Or actually it was the lame Frenchman that made us leave since he somehow angered the security guard and got himself kicked out. Since the place was lame the rest of us followed.  By the drunken logic "We visited a lame place in Kings Cross, ergo Kings Cross must be a lame location" we started walking towards the city. 

 

 

While walking I got in "send an overly extensive and emotional text message" mode. This is an occasional habit I have when getting drunk with very limited usefulness as women don't tend to become more positively minded just because they get a massive text message spanning over eight text messages in the middle of the night. It still makes more sense to me to get drunk and whine to the source of the problem than paying $150 to whine to a charlatan with a degree in psychology

 

 

When reaching message 5 of this extensive and as it turned out unanswered text, I was interrupted. Apparently my crew had somehow managed to anger a large group of angry teenage punks. Fortunately after some of the usual name calling and what are you looking at clichés the battle never took place. This was good from both an arithmetical and motivational view. From an arithmetical view it was good that the battle was cancelled as they outnumbered us 3 to 1. From a motivational point of view it was also good, as I had no motivation whatsoever for a battle neither at the moment nor in the long run. 15 minutes later fuelled by beer muscles Danni’s French friend and Japanese friend considered it to be a good idea to find the angry mob of 14 years old that had mucked us earlier.  This was an extremely bad idea so I and Danni went to the Star Bar to play some pool instead.

 

 

After being smashed in pool for a few rounds I went to the toilet. There I came across a couple trying to get it on, not in a booth but in the open. Like a porno movie! :D  Unlike a porno movie the guy could not get it up which is not exactly unexpected from someone drunk enough getting the idea to get it on in the open. Oh anyway after a long piss I got inspired. I walked to woman pulled down her panties and gave her a lick with my razor tongue. Strangely enough none of them got offended which was also very porno movie like... :) What was unlike a porno movie was that instead of getting a BJ and squirting a Santa Beard on the woman in the end; the security guard came in and kicked us all out.

 

 

Oh well he was nice enough to not press any charges and settled with giving us a 24 hour ban, which ruins my prospect of doing the same thing at the same toilet tonight, but I am sure I can live with that. 

 

 

After this event I and Danni had a few more uneventful drinks at another venue before he headed for the airport and I headed back home.

 

 

But to summarise: The crew getting kicked out from two venues, almost getting in a fight with a large gang of angry teenagers, joining in on other peoples sexual activities.  That’s a crazy night I reckon, and a night to remember. :)

 

 

// The Master   

 

This Wednesday I had some minor career issues. The reason was that I went for "quick" interview as bar attendant at the stadium, but they had forgotten to mention in the E-mail that one was also expected to stick around for a few hours of "training". Since they did not mention this I had a shift booked in at another place. This clash ended with me 

• Missing half the training
• Coming late to the shift
• Paying for a cab fee